Rod's Garden Report

The Garden Report #109

Sunday, December 2nd, 2012

Our spring garden is but a dream now

• Writers write: The Santa Claus Trilogy are three stories that some of you may have read before, but no apologies, they’re classics.

#1: Over the years, I have enjoyed playing Santa Claus at children’s functions. Good fun. Around 1982, I was doing my bit at The Big Brothers Christmas Party. It was held at Knox Met. After I was finished, I drove away not in my sleigh, but my half ton truck. Sanity must return to the story. As I headed down Victoria Avenue, at City Hall, there was a Volvo and its engine was on fire. The owner had the hood open but all he could do was watch the flames shoot upwards. I pulled over, grabbed the scoop shovel from the back of the truck and fired six shovels filled with snow onto the flames until they subsided. Totally forgetting what I was wearing, I returned to my truck with the fire engines speeding down the street. The owner of the Volvo waved good bye to me as I drove away and in a disbelieving voice, shouted “thanks Santa!”

#2: I enjoyed stopping into homes of children that I knew when I had my costume on. Five minutes of fun for me and they became true believers. “He really does exist. He came to our house” they would tell their friends in Grade One the next day. The little boy next door was an immediate convert. I could tell by his eyes that he knew I was the real thing. He sat on my lap to tell me what he wanted for Christmas. First I asked him the obligatory question of “have you been a good boy?” He nodded his head in the affirmative. “I have been a good boy. A very good boy.” Then he whispered into my ear “don’t listen to my sister. She lies.”

#3: Sometimes we do little things that make impressions that children remember for their life time, yet it is gone from our memory in a few days. I attended the memorial service for my friend Judy Burlock this summer. At the entrance to the service, greeting us, was one of her three adult children. I had not been over to Judy and Aubrey’s house since the 1970s so I assumed introductions were needed. I started by saying to her son “my name is Rod McDonald and I was a friend of your mother.” The greeter said “I know who you are Rod. You have been a part of our Christmas mythology and stories, ever since you showed up as Santa Claus when I was just a little boy.”

• Readers write:

• Gayle White supports the discussion of donor cards. “Dear Rod: I am a regular reader and I am so pleased that you brought up the topic of organ donations in your latest Report. I would like to urge all of your readers to not only sign their own cards, but to take the time to talk to those people in their lives who are younger. I assume 70-year old organs aren’t considered premium quality! We tend to not want to talk about death in our society, but organ donation is a life-giving process. So, fellow readers, let’s make it a priority to bring up this issue in as many situations as we decently can.”

• Chris Dodd sent this along: “I have signed my donor card and alerted my family. They expressed doubt that anyone would want any of it soon. But I agree with you, we can’t remind people too often to donate. On a lighter note, I love your Grammar Police. I wonder if I was taught incorrectly or if I have forgotten it accurately, but didn’t they used to tell us to use the word fewer when we were describing items one could count, but to use less when we spoke about items too numerous to count – like grains of sand? I’m off to work on an appropriate uniform for The Grammar Police.” Rod’s note: Roberta Nichol already has t-shirts printed for those stalwart maintainers of the English language.

• Doug Gummeson is a new reader from Moose Jaw. He writes: “It is nice to receive your Garden Report. If it was me, I would rename it to Garden Report Plus just because there is much more than garden information.”

• Friend and reader John Huston, from Toronto, always has an interesting, if somewhat offbeat take on The Garden Report. “While I can't agree more on the awfulness that is Black Friday and Boxing Day sales, I must weigh in, again, on a couple of Yule tide misconceptions. First, ‘Xmas’ is not a contemporary secular abbreviation for Christmas. In fact it is just the opposite: ‘Xmas’ has a long and venerable tradition. It was used as far back as the 1st millennium by educated Christians, probably to save precious parchment. The X was adopted from the Greek letter Chi, the first letter in the Greek word for Christ.”

• Frank Flegel has had it up to the proverbial here with political correctness. He writes “I am told that Obama has referred to a holiday tree rather than a Christmas tree. Perhaps Canada should not send a tree to the U.S. this year as it has done for many a moon. We don't have holiday trees, just Christmas trees. Not too many years ago I happened to be in Prince Albert for a meeting and was pleased to see a Christmas Crèche complete with Mary, Joseph, the Christ child and animals displayed in the City Hall lobby. I wonder if it is still there and the people of P.A. continue to say, "the hell with political correctness!"

• Elaine Wurm has views about Christmas as do most of you. “I must say, I totally agree with your comments about retail personnel and Christmas shopping. You were right on the mark with your comment of how retail people are so exhausted by Christmas day.”

• Brad Kreutzer owns Paper Umbrella on 13th Avenue. Here is his take on the snow removal issue. “Thank you once again for your wonderful Report. They are filled with such interesting and thoughtful topics. In reading your comments regarding snow removal on 13th Ave, I couldn't agree more. 13th Avenue has a very high amount of traffic on its road that it is simply way too dangerous to not have it at a higher priority for snow removal. This topic has long been raised with the city over the years, by many business owners along 13th Ave. Perhaps with some of the newly elected officials, things may change in the future. Here is hoping!

'Marie Victorin' rose

     Moving on to the topic of slippery sidewalks along 13th Ave. I can only speak from my personal experience but I along with many of my neighboring businesses take great pride in maintaining the sidewalks in front of our businesses. As a member of the Business Association we have in the past pooled our money to remove snow along 13th Ave for the safety and convenience of our community. Ironically, the 13th Ave Safeway is spending much money on a renovation to improve the customer experience, yet they still can't clear off the sidewalks that surround their store. Going forward into the future we may have to look at ways in which we the businesses care for our sidewalks collectively. However, I would hate to think that your readers might get the impression that 13th Ave businesses aren't interested in safe sidewalks. Keep up the great work Rod.” Rod responds: I realize that some of the merchants do keep their walks clean but I want more. I want to see the walks on both sides of the street clear, from Albert to Elphinstone Streets. I cannot walk safely from one clean sidewalk, through the ice fields of the next block until I find another clean sidewalk.

• Kate Berrigner is concerned about Black Friday entering into Canada. “Re: The Black Friday rant........well said. I'm annoyed that it’s come up here and I hate Boxing Day/Week sales that detract from people being able to celebrate Christmas or whatever they celebrate, properly! However, I guess lots of people celebrate money and what it can buy so perhaps it’s only those of us who don’t who are annoyed?”

• Wendy Richardson shares her views regarding Christmas presents. “I completely agree with you about Christmas. We celebrate as a family and that has always been the focus of our time, not the gifts. The past few years we have drawn names and given to one person in our immediate family and that has been fun. We don't spend a huge amount of money, but we get to focus on just one person and tune in to that person and bless them with love and thought in the choosing of their gift.”

• Georgia Hearn turns the subject back to our readers favorite one, eating. “Great issue...I have to get to La Bodega for fish and chips.”

• Don Volpel has a take on snow removal and sanding. “I really enjoyed your Garden Report this week as well as the others. I have a pet peeve for the City Fathers and that is when they clean the roads of snow (which is appreciated) they do not bother to sand the street intersections for a considerable time after. This makes driving extremely dangerous even at 15 to 20 kph. There I have ranted.”

• Ann Anderson followed my instructions on poinsettia care last year and she found success. Here is her testimonial. “Hi Rod, I'll order a 6-inch pot poinsettia. Last year, I followed your care instructions to the letter and my plant was gorgeous.”

• Who owns hockey: Between the owners and the players, we have no NHL hockey. I kind of thought that hockey was Canada’s game, our game and that it belonged to the people per se. Apparently that is not true. Pond hockey, back lane shinny and street hockey belong to us. We start and finish a game whenever we want. But after that, hockey belongs to associations, leagues, owners, anyone but us. It turns out that what I kind of thought, was kind of wrong. It was more fun when there was no money involved. It was more fun when hockey finished in March, not June.

• Garden Tip: When you plant an amaryllis bulb, best to leave a third of it sticking above the soil line. They do not like to be plunged all the way down. Do not chill an amaryllis bulb as you would daffs or tulips. They are originally from South America and do not know what cold feels like. Do not worry if your amaryllis bulb does not begin to grow as quick as others. Amaryllis have a mind of their own. I have grown thousands of them over a thirty-five year time frame. Some will begin growing the day after planting and others will take two or three months before they show any sign of life. They can be very unpredictable.

• Random acts of kindness: Most of us have been the recipient of a random act of kindness. Sometimes it was proffered by a friend, other times by a stranger. One random acts of kindness as a recipient came from a favorite teacher, Luella Lovering. She enrolled me into The Fine Arts program in 1967 because as she said, “I read what you write.” Forty-six years later, I still write. What is difficult to fathom is that on occasion, we have been the people who offered up those random act of kindness. Yet, someone must be the giver in order for others to receive. Sometimes we comprehend what we offered and other times, we carry on with our lives, never understanding how one small act on our part, could have a positive outcome for others.

     I knew a man who had been a star athlete in his day. Heart surgery had reduced him to taking walks at midnight, lest the neighbors saw how he had deteriorated. He was in my garden center, wandering around. He told me about his situation. I asked if he wanted to come in every Wednesday morning, to work in the greenhouse for three hours. “Some people find a greenhouse to be a therapeutic experience,” I offered. He leapt at the chance. We had a spare bench at the back of the greenhouse. Soon, he was growing his own plants on that vacant bench. He and his wife began coming in every other day to check on their seedlings. I thought nothing more of it. It had not cost me anything. That Christmas, a card arrived. In it, he told me that the day I had asked if he would like to work in the greenhouse, he had been thinking of suicide. He felt that his life was over. My offer, which was so small that I never expected even a thank you, had saved him by giving hope. Who knew? At this time of year, send in your stories about random acts of kindness. Share those wonderful outcomes. You don’t have to be a Jimmy Stewart in ‘A Wonderful Life’ to tell your story.

• It’s so good to see you: My neighbor came to the window the other day. She was waving at me. I waved back. She kept waving, so I waved a second time. The waving continued so I went closer to the window to reduce the glare and to see if she was in distress, what with the continual waving. It was her dog, wagging his tail. No distress. The exact opposite. No one was home and he was just so glad to see me. Wag, wag! Now that is a true friend.

• How to improve your wife: After all these years, I have discovered how to turn your partner into being a better wife. My secret, which really I should be selling is simple, just become a better husband. It works every time.

• Oh no: I finally got to La Bodega to try their fish and chips that several of you have been raving about. Please don’t blame the messenger, but my fish arrived soggy. Yep. You read that correctly. Soggy as in spongy as in not crispy. They were not good. On the plus side, the chips were the finest in town. Fourteen bucks plus tax and tip. I am still on the hunt for great fish and chips so if you have a favorite, fire off a line or two. In the running are Bushwackers and The Creek on 13th which I have not yet checked out.

• Garden Tip: If you need to get the attention of someone running power equipment such as a snow blower, always get in front of them and connect visually. Do not tap them on the shoulder, if you value your life or well being. The noise of the motor overrides all of the senses and a tap sets off a primitive response of being attacked.

• Light up the Village: Many of the merchants along 13th Avenue are staging a ‘Light up the Village’ night on Thursday, December 6th. The folks at The Paper Umbrella have reader and author CJ Katz signing her new cookbook at seven p.m. This book is beautiful and would make a great gift for someone on your list.

• Friendly driver, or not: A few years ago, I was removing the snow from the city sidewalk along Regina Avenue. Usually, I blow the snow onto the lawn but this time, I was too lazy to rotate the blower as it was my last pass so the snow was falling back onto the street. It was the ridge the city graders had pushed up, so I rationalized I was not being that much of a bad boy. A full sized Ford pulls up and the driver is honking his horn. I can’t see who it is because darkness is setting in and he has tinted, side windows. I can make out that he is waving at me, so being a good Canadian, I wave back. Must be a friend. He honks his horn a second time, waving with great enthusiasm. I squint. I can’t see who it is but I return the wave. It must be a neighbor, thanking me for cleaning his portion of the walk. He honks a third time and now is frantic in his waving actions. I get closer to his window to see who it is and its an old codger, well at least older than me. I don’t know him and he is definitely not waving. He is shaking his fist and swearing at me, increasingly frustrated because I am being just so damned friendly, waving back. He is annoyed greatly, than the snow is been returned to the street from where it came. Once I had figured this all out, I was too embarrassed to retaliate. I just kept waving and smiling at him as if I were the village idiot until he gave up and drove down to Albert Street.

Rayanne has big eyes

• The Grampa Report: A few years ago, I was having lunch at The Bessborough in Saskatoon with a few friends from the trade. One had recently become a grandfather. He filled up the entire hour with how his grandson was the smartest kid medical science had ever seen. I promised myself that I would never do that to you, my dear readers, when my turn came. Well, my turn has now come and all you get from me is a photo and then I zip my lip. Of course, if someone wanted to phone and talk about how wonderful she is, I might just have a free hour or two. She specializes in eating, pooping and crying at the top of her lungs, if you need a topic to discuss.

So far, she has not discovered boys

• The Gamma Report: I was sitting there, comfortably, watching the news. The grandmother of this story opens a big brown envelope and begins showing me photos of Rayanna. I try to explain that I have already seen the photos. “The kids sent me the photos online.” “But these are the printed ones,” was her response. Nothing I could say or do would make her stop. I felt as if I was trapped inside a dream within a dream. I resisted but it was futile. She told me that even Mike Holmes would want to look at these pictures. “See how long her legs are?”

• Garden Tip: Do not use salt to melt ice on sidewalks near your garden or lawn. Salt raises the PH of your soil causing distress to most ornamentals. There are other products on the market that are much safer to use.

• You’re a good boy, yes you are: The Humane Society has a poster of a dog that needs a forever home. If you are interested and have room for him in your life, give them a call. As regular readers know, I have a real soft spot for kitty cats and puppy dogs.

• Kiss the Canvas: That was the name of the boxing event staged by a dozen women this past Thursday evening at The Lonsdale Boxing Club. They raised $75,000 for The Palliative Care Center. It was so much fun, with the fans cheering on their friends and coworkers, just as boxing used to be. The matches were good and the ladies gave it their best shot, pun intended. George Chuvalo was in attendance and the crowd gave him a standing ovation. The line up to get photos and autographs from the Canadian legend was long. I didn’t join in as I was worried I might gush when it was my turn. I probably would have said “I’ m a boxer too” and George would have replied “good for you Sparky, good for you.”

Poinsettia Fund Raiser for The Marian Center: Last call!

The Marian Center benefits from our poinsettia sale

I am organizing a poinsettia fund raiser for The Marian Center, again, this year. We will raise at least a thousand dollars to support their soup kitchen that feeds hungry men in downtown Regina. The poinsettias will be available for pick up at my house on Saturday, December 8th between noon and four p.m. They will be premium poinsettias, in a decorative cover with a touch of silver fairy dust. They are available in three colors. Red, pink, white and if ordered by the case, mixed. They are only available by pre order and payable by cash. Sorry, no credit cards, debit or checks. Also note, there are no greens or wreaths for sale this year. The poinsettia prices are as follows (the same as last year):

Six inch premium $20 each or $14 each in a case of seven which is $98 (red, white or pink)

Seven inch premium $30 each or $25 each in a case of five (these have two cuttings per pot and are available in red, white or red and white)

Eight inch premium $40 each (these have three cuttings, are very large as in best displayed on the floor. They are perfect for a store or a large home. Available colors are red, white and tricolor)



Thanks for reading…Rod McDonald in the snow belt of Regina